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- Sep 9, 2020
- 2 min
What pulls you back into right now?
Like me, you may spend an inordinate amount of time in your head. Thinking, strategizing, planning, contemplating, unraveling complex issues. Oh yeah, and worrying. All of that can be good, as far as it goes. And, it is also fatiguing and means you miss out on a lot. A recent Harvard study reports that people spend 47% of their time thinking about what isn't going on and that this mind-wandering typically makes them unhappy. Wait. WHAT? If you have your head down, rework
- Sep 2, 2020
- 3 min
How does coherence support meaning, no matter what?
There are a lot of out-of-the-ordinary things going on for many of us right now, so many it could make a person's head spin. Losing a coveted position after a pre-COVID buy-out, a partner's acute medical emergency (on top of demanding project deadlines and COVID), a young adult's deepening depression, exacerbated by physical separation. Broadening your awareness of coherence can support meaning, even in the face of severe hardship. No, it is never a good thing be diagnosed
- Aug 26, 2020
- 3 min
What choices are you willing to make right now, when so much feels out of control?
When I am stressed, a persistent voice in my mind whines "Everything is out of control!" The superintendent's office hasn't prepared sufficiently for online learning and I am anxious about how I'm going to manage my child's learning. The workplace is changing and I barely recognize it anymore - everyone wants definitive answers and there aren't any. I've dropped my child off for their freshman year of college but I suspect none of this is going to work and my child is going
- Aug 21, 2020
- 3 min
Why invest your precious energy in nurturing connection?
You are stretched thin by the pandemic, trying to juggle a million balls at once. Or, you used to have a million balls to juggle and it gave you tremendous energy, but the pandemic has put a "halt" to all of that. In the normal world, an important balancing tool for overwhelm or underwhelm was connecting with family and friends in familiar, time-tested ways; meeting for a glass of wine after work, getting together for a movie, catching up with others at religious services on
- Jul 29, 2020
- 2 min
What is the advantage of creating space for paradoxical feelings?
"How are you?" The answer I give to that question can either be performative "I am fine, and you?" Or real... "I am feeling overwhelmed." Or, I can go a bit deeper and notice the paradoxical feelings under the surface. Paradoxical feelings remind me that I am not one or the other, in or out, either/or. I am both/and. There is richness under my surface and when I chose to look at it and share it, I see more of myself, as well as allowing myself to be seen more fully by peo
- Jul 22, 2020
- 2 min
What is happening when the once engaging conversation turns into "wah, wah, wah..."?
Try this on for size: You used to look forward to interactions with your colleagues or fellow board members, but now all you hear is "wah, wah, wah...." You can't wait to get off of the call, your mind wanders, you find a million ways to deflect from the deadlines (or homeschooling or housecleaning or chart updates) that await you and more often than not, you think to yourself "I just CAN'T!" But you don't tell anyone that. Because who would say "I CAN'T?" Not you. Inste
- Jul 15, 2020
- 2 min
How will you find your way without visible light at the end of the tunnel?
When it is no longer 2 weeks or 2 months but "for the foreseeable future," we know we're in for the long haul. While it could be the COVID pandemic, or messy-as-hell cancer treatment, or working within an organization that no longer even slightly resembles the organization you knew and loved, it is normal to experience deeply itchy overwhelm. The good news is that there are tried and true tools to help you find your way. Dr. Elena Miller, an integrative psychiatrist and 2x c
- Jul 8, 2020
- 3 min
"How are you?" I mean REALLY how are you?
When I see you and ask "How are you?" your answer may depend on where I sit in your concentric boundary circles. Do you say "I'm fine, thank you! And you?" Or do you say "I'm irritated today because I'm feeling so constrained." And perhaps if things are going well, "I'm feeling energized because I have the freedom to choose where I physically work." Or might you say "This is the worst year of my life - I'm falling apart and I have no where to turn. I think I'm going to lose
