top of page
  • Ricka Robb Kohnstamm

How do you move yourself from "should" to "will"?

Many of my clients are getting back to it this week, and so am I.

No matter where you are stuck or overwhelmed, how does reframing your inner dialogue into something kind and motivating, rather than harsh and critical, support your optimal health?

When getting back it, the "should" voice of the self-critic can get annoyingly loud...

"I should eat better. Other people do it, why don't I?"

"I should move my body more... maybe I would have more energy if I did. I am a slug."

"I should prioritize my time and make space for the things I really want to do... My life is moving along quickly and I'm already having regrets about what I'm not doing."

"I should stop letting that annoying coworker get on my nerves."

Yes. And...

Personally, I don't find the self-critic to be very motivating.

What I find more motivating (after I turn towards the self-critic, thank it for its time and ask it to take a step back) is to reframe my inner dialogue into something kind, using "will" statements, based on what I want to do.

"I will eat better by focusing on whole foods and I'll notice how that feels after I do it."

"I will make moving my body a priority most days of the week and then I'll notice how it feels to have more energy."

"I will have lovely thank you notes and stamps ready so that I can express my gratitude to others easily and often."

"I will pay attention to when I am hooked emotionally and consciously take a step back - and then notice how that feels."

My inner dialogue is a choice - I can give the self-critic my full attention or I can reframe into a more motivating internal dialogue. It is up to me.

Reach out to me when you are ready to reframe your inner dialogue - I can help you unwind the complex barriers that are getting in your way and together we can create a pathway that works.

When I remember that it is within my control to reframe my inner dialogue into something that is kind and motivating, it feels healthy.

Hello, I'm Ricka.

Ricka Kohnstamm Executive & Physician Coach Profile Photo

I'm a Nationally Board Certified (NBC-HWC) Integrative Health and Wellbeing Coach. I specialize in working with physician leaders, corporate leaders, non-profit executives and their families to navigate complex work and personal issues so they can strengthen their relationships, heal, and feel hopeful about the future again. 



Subscribe to My Newsletter to receive the latest blogs and updates from me.

Featured Posts

bottom of page